Miyazaki’s Last Laugh

There’s an enemy in the Bloodborne expansion ‘Old Hunters’ that has caused me more problems than any of the boss fights. Well, other than the final one, that one is a total arse of a fight..But this guy in question is a boss in all but big health bar at the bottom of the screen.

There’s a well you see, a totally unassuming well in the middle of a fishing village. You’ll probably pass it by the first time you go through here because there’s bigger fish (literally) in the area to fry. It was only when I had finally beat the story and wanted to mop up the trophies to get that lovely double 100%.

Probably some spoilers below, enemy wise.

Down there, down this seemingly standard piece of scenery lies a weapon that you need for the Old Hunter’s Essence trophy. A skill weapon that would suit my character perfectly. To get it, you have to fight one of the ‘bigger fish’ I mentioned above. Not a big deal at first, you’ve probably faced a few of these guys on your travels; but this guy…this fucking prick is something else.

The Big Shark Guys are tough enemies with a really erratic move set, I had a hard time judging what was coming next. Couple this with some insane tracking on their swings and a dumb-looking-but-deadly ‘dive and flail around’ move that will stun lock you easily and you really have something to be feared. But of course, this is Bloodborne, this is Miyazaki, so there’s more: he has a huge pool of health, easily double that of his normal buddies. Oh yeah, and whereas they fight with their hands, this twat brings an anchor to the fight.


‘But what’s that…a ledge over looking the arena? Excellent! I’ll make my way around there and cheese him with projectiles!’ – See… Miyazaki knows you’ll be looking for an easy way to fight this guy and in a way, he provides one. Only, to get to this ledge you have to deal with two Winter Lanterns, easily the most over-powered and infuriating (but coolest named) enemies in the game. These walking malformed brains will fill your frenzy meter in seconds, making any real attempt to fight them a ‘massive, infuriating ballache’.

So, by now you’ve probably realised there’s no real easy way to do this and you resign yourself to a long fight. You learn the moves, start to get a rhythm down…hey, you’re gonna do this! He’s down to 1/4 health! But why is he walking away? What…what’s doing?!?

Calling for back up.

On the ceiling to the cave, just straight up chillin’ is another shark guy who Anchor shark will summon down to help *just* as you feel like you’re winning and once again tipping the odds well and truly against you.

It is purely a classic Miyazaki predicament: place something just within reach, but make the task of gaining it a seemingly monumental one. It’s almost like he knew that you’d return to get the weapon at the end game stage, so he thew one last challenge at you to make you earn it. Like Havel, or Capra or that Rotting Dragon in the Painted World – he knows how to hook you into a challenge for a reward, whether it’s a key, item or a shortcut.

And like all Souls/Borne challenges, the run in which I finally accomplished the task felt easy and simple, a combination of my skill and the game’s mechanics gelling to create a wondrous symphony of…who am I kidding? I made it through by the skin of my teeth. I was lucky to survive.

Here’s a badly edited video of my ‘victory’. Enjoy.


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