I Lost My Heart To A Grey Phantom

****contains 2 mild spoiler-y images, though ones not really a spoiler as it’s a bog standard weapon…and the other one you can probably see now so this may be already too late. Soz x*****

By Gav James-Weir

I’ve recently hit ‘The Fear’ after finding my way into Shrine of Amana. Whilst seemingly serene, it’ s full of casters and I am totally not specced for taking magic damage.

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You can see one of the casters to the left…Ohhhh look at you with your homing spells. Jerk.

At first, I tried running through the area after this photo only to be cut down by homing spells inches away from a fog gate. My only sensible option is to take them on ranged with my +7 Hunter’s Blackbow (I love this thing), but it’s a slow process that I just can’t face since I cleared the area out only to fall down a big hole I had no hope of seeing.

Dark Souls…

So last night, I decided to hit up the Bell Keepers Covenant after a few people on twitter talked about it being a great way of getting some lovely Titante Chunks and more importantly, not full of things that want me dead. Off I went to Belfry Luna, talked to the crazy dwarf and joined up. Full disclosure: I’m AWFUL at PvP. It might be down to my internet connection being a bit rubbish, but chances are it’s more a case of me lacking any sort of skill. I tend to get too eager and foolishly start swinging widly, leaving myself open.

Once in the Belfry, I got invaded a few times, took a few down, but mostly I was ruined within moments. Gained a few chunks of  Titanite and felt good.  Then came a reminder of why I fucking love Dark Souls multiplayer.

Switching it up, I headed to Belfry Sol. Got invaded within a few minutes of standing around, a fellow Claymore build. We bowed, raised our shields and commenced the duel, circling each other, taking little stabs like a prize fighter looking for an opening. Things went well, got him down to half  health, took a few hits myself but I was confident of this one. Evenly matched, similarly equipped.


Shit. Two of them. No fucking chance.

I see the other guy approach he’s a heavy build, big armour, duel Cestus. I’m fucked. But he waits. He just stands there, watching. He follows us about as we fight never once interfering. It feels like a weird Fight Club as he starts doing the ‘pumped up’ gesture. I get nervous with the unexpected spectator, gotta make this look good. The guy takes a swing, I roll through and instantly lash out with two heavy attacks. They connect,  He’s down. I turn to face the other challenger. Still he doesn’t attack, he actually waits until I heal up first.

Amazing. I love this man. A gentleman amongst thieves, I hope he feels the same way.

I heal, we bow, I raise my shield…he runs forward and proceeds to smack seven shades of shit out of me. Didn’t stand a chance. I don’t think he does feel the same…

After being attacked whilst bowing numerous times and all of those embarrassing ‘TRY REAR LOL’ messages left near EVERY female character (who’s still rating these things!? More importantly, who’s writing them?? Fuck off, whoever you are), I was starting to get annoyed with the multiplayer side. I remember way back when (last year), I was reading the Dark Souls wiki and I came across the ‘Duel Etiquette’ section. I was genuinely blown away. The game never suggests any of this, but the community has formed its own rules to engagement, a code to ensure every fight is fair and as equal as possible. Having grown tired of the usual multiplayer communities of angry teenagers shouting at you for daring to win, this all felt like a beautiful, civilised place. Even if someone invades my game and ruins my day, there’s still a code to do such things by. From have accidentally created this by giving the players a limited, but amazing way of conversing. A bow signifies that sure, the invader is here to get in your way and make your play a little harder, but to quote Omar Little, ‘it’s all in the game, yo’. Without the bow, it’s just an aggressive troll kicking sand in your face and running off with your girlfriend. Maybe.

So here’s to you, Darkwolf1304, thanks for sticking to the code and waiting until it was fair before you spread my face all over the Belfry floor. For me, the day you strolled into the Belfry was the most important day of my Dark Souls life. For you, it was Tuesday (it was actually Wednesday but shut up).

Totally unrelated note: After getting wrecked by a guy using them last night, I gave the Claws a go. Whilst not for me (not this character anyway), I gotta share how fucking badass I look.

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Like a medieval Wolverine. Who keeps his shirt on. I’m looking at you, Jackman. Yeah, you’re 45 and in great shape, we get it. Put a fucking shirt on.




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